Priceless

this is just inspired, methinks.

When a Man Loves a Woman...

... he has this waiting for her when she gets home from work:

Homemade Tortillas

Ingredients


3 cups unbleached flour
2 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp. salt
4-6 Tbsp. vegetable shortening or lard (I use Crisco)
about 1 1/4 cups warm water


Mix dry ingredients in a large bowl.

Add vegetable shortening, cutting into the dry ingredients with your hands. Add warm water until the dough becomes soft and elastic. If it's sticky, you've added too much water, add in a little flour until the balance is correct.

Knead the dough for a few minutes.

Make golf ball sized rolls and set them aside to rest for 10-15 minutes.
Heat a griddle, or comal if you have one, to medium high.

Roll out the tortilla dough on a lightly floured surface. I like my tortillas a little thicker, but you can adjust the thickness as you like.

Lay your tortilla on the hot griddle. Let it cook for 15-30seconds and then flip.

Keep them pliant by keeping the freshly made tortillas covered with a tea towel.
Enjoy!

Moroccan Dinner, Tyler Florence Style - sorta

Ingredients
Moroccan Spice Mix:
1 cinnamon stick, chopped in pieces
8 whole cloves
1 teaspoon cayenne
2 teaspoons cumin seed
1 teaspoon fennel seed
1 teaspoon coriander seed
1 tablespoon sweet paprika
11/2 teaspoons kosher salt
1 teaspoon brown sugar

Chicken:
1 (31/2 pound) whole free range chicken
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
1 lemon, halved
1/4 bunch fresh cilantro
1 head garlic
3 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil

Apricot Couscous:
1 cup couscous
11/2 cups warm water
10 dried apricots
2 green onions, green parts only
2 handfuls fresh mint leaves
2 handfuls fresh cilantro leaves
1/2 lemon, juiced
2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper

Directions:
To prepare the Moroccan Spice Mix for the Chicken: Combine the cinnamon stick, cloves, cayenne, cumin, fennel, coriander, and paprika in a dry skillet over low heat and toast for just a minute to release the fragrant oils; shake the pan so they don't scorch. In a spice mill or clean coffee grinder, grind the toasted spices together, with 1 1/2 teaspoons of kosher salt and the brown sugar. (A word of advice: make sure you thoroughly wipe out your coffee grinder before you make coffee again - Moroccan spices taste great on chicken but horrible with coffee.)

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F.

Rinse the chicken with cool water, inside and out, then pat it dry with paper towels. Massage the chicken skin with the spice rub; make sure you don't miss a spot. Season the inside of the chicken generously with salt and pepper. Stuff the lemons halves, cilantro, and garlic in the cavity and place the chicken in a roasting pan fitted with a rack. Fold the wing tips under the bird and tie the legs together with kitchen string. Drizzle the oil all over the chicken. If you have time, let the chicken marinate for 30 minutes to really get the flavors down deep into the meat. Roast the chicken for 1 hour; pop an instant-read thermometer into the thickest part of the thigh; if it reads 160 degrees F, it's done. Allow the chicken to rest for 10 minutes so the juices can settle back into the meat. Remove and discard the skin from the chicken. Pull the chicken from the bone and shred the meat, with your fingers or 2 forks. Put the shredded chicken in a large bowl and squeeze the lemon halves that have cooked inside the bird over the meat to moisten.

To prepare the Apricot Couscous: Put the couscous in a medium bowl; pour the water over it, stir with a fork to combine. Cover and let sit for 10 to 15 minutes, then uncover and fluff with a fork. Put the apricots, almonds, green onions, mint, and cilantro on a cutting board and coarsely chop everything up; add this to the couscous. Add lemon juice, drizzle with olive oil, and season with salt and pepper. Toss gently to combine.

Pizza

One of the most surprising consequences of reading Animal, Vegetable, Miracle was the new found joy of making food from scratch.

This was my first attempt at homemade pizza, something I was pretty hesitant to try. To make it a little easier on myself the first time out, I divided my home-made pizza into three attempts: On the first round, I only made the dough from scratch and used store-bought tomato sauce and mozzarella. It turned out pretty tasty!








My second pizza had homemade dough and homemade tomato sauce:

My third attempt was even better: homemade everything, including basil from my 5 ft basil plant!

It friggin' rocked. :D

L'Jardin

I can finally say I am starting to feel like I love my home. Which is to say, I've certainly been proud of what we've been able to do with it, how we've improved it etc etc, but all this time, in the back of my mind, I've held out loving the house because I kept waiting for something, anything, to happen to make us have to move. It must be due to the cumulative years of temporary residences - since college I don't think I've lived in any one place for more than 3 years.

But I LOVE my house. And my garden.

When I put it together before the wedding, I didn't quite realize what an undertaking it was going to be. According to Lasagna Gardening, I should have only built a garden bed that was 4x4ft... yeah, I kinda neglected to read that part. The bed was easily 4x that. And, granted, I thought it looked pretty good for what it was - a hodgepodge collection of flowers, a lone lime tree and decorative grasses that had no rhyme or reason to them, using a gardening method that I'd never tried before. (There's a reason why the day before the wedding I was still frantically stuffing annuals into the ground in the hopes of filling out the gardenscape - it was a little bare looking for all the back breaking work that went into it.)

Now that the garden has had a chance to settle, the annuals are long dead and withered (and mulched), some plants, as it turns out, did really well; others, not so much. Those that survived the drought last summer and the colder than usual Austin winter are blooming like crazy. My little lime tree has exploded with new leafy growth goodness. The lavendar and sage are flowering like crazy. Even my stunted rosemary is showing signs of new growth. As for my mint, well, let's just say I guess I did not read the instructions very carefully, because lo and behold, that one lil' mint plant up and went rogue on me! It spawned about a dozen offshoots that are slowly taking over the garden. If not for the fact that we go through so much mint (mojitos, anyone?) during the summer, I might be upset, but as it is, I'm just glad I don't have to buy any more plants.

And happiness! Spring mulching consisted of 1/4 cu. yd of mulch, as opposed to the 4 cu yds it took to build the sucker. For all that we had no rain and hard freezes, most of the plants fared surprisingly well - to the point that at least, they're coming back like gangbusters.

So far this year we've added a pear tree to the mix (well, to the yard, it's on the opposite side of the garden, but whatever), as well as tomato plants, dill, thyme, oregano, leeks (which, erm, I don't think are supposed to last through summer, but we'll just see what happens, ok?). And shh! I even snuck in three peonies ... although I'll be shocked if they grow into anything. I'm pretty sure I planted them at the wrong time, and I'm not entirely convinced I didn't plant them upside down. Oh well. We'll see.

If I can scrape enough left over money, I'm going to see about getting some squash into the ground, and maybe, maybe a lemon and/or avocado tree. Be still my beating heart - homegrown avocado! I can't wait to have homemade salsa from my own tomatoes, limes and onions, homemade guac from my own avocado tree... on homemade tortillas..., oi, excuse me while I wipe the drool away.

Summer#1.0

I still need to add images of the garden from the wedding, which was a few weeks after the garden went in, as well as better photos of what the bed as it looks now.

Funniest Craig's List Post

NINJA HAULER: 2005 Nissan Xterra - $12900 (Ronan / Lake County )

Reply to: sale-945361858@craigslist.org [?]Date: 2008-12-04, 5:15PM MST OK, let me start off by saying this Xterra is only available for purchase by the manliest of men (or women). My friend, if it was possible for a vehicle to sprout chest hair and a five o'clock shadow, this Nissan would look like Tom Selleck. It is just that manly. It was never intended to drive to the mall so you can pick up that adorable shirt at Abercrombie & Fitch that you had your eye on. It wasn't meant to transport you to yoga class or Linens & Things. No, that's what your Prius is for. If that's the kind of car you're looking for, then just do us all a favor and stop reading right now. I mean it. Just stop. This car was engineered by 3rd degree ninja super-warriors in the highest mountains of Japan to serve the needs of the man that cheats death on a daily basis. They didn't even consider superfluous nancy boy amenities like navigation systems (real men don't get lost), heated leather seats (a real man doesn't let anything warm his butt), or On Star (real men don't even know what the hell On Star is). No, this brute comes with the things us testosterone-fueled super action junkies need. It has a 265 HP engine to outrun the cops. It's got special blood/gore resistant upholstery. It even has a first-aid kit in the back. You know what the first aid kit has in it? A pint of whiskey, a stitch-your-own-wound kit and a hunk of leather to bite down on when you're operating on yourself. The Xterra also has an automatic transmission so if you're being chased by Libyan terrorists, you'll still be able to shoot your machine gun out the window and drive at the same time. It's saved my bacon more than once. It has room for you and the four hotties you picked up on the way to the gym to blast your pecs and hammer your glutes. There's a tow hitch to pull your 50 caliber anti-Taliban, self cooling machine gun. I also just put in a new windshield to replace the one that got shot out by The Man. My price on this bad boy is an incredibly low $12,900, but I'll entertain reasonable offers. And by reasonable, I mean don't walk up and tell me you'll give me $5,000 for it. That's liable to earn you a Burmese-roundhouse-sphincter-kick with a follow up three fingered eye-jab. Would it hurt? Hell yeah. Let's just say you won't be the prettiest guy at the Coldplay concert anymore. There's only 69,000 miles on this four-wheeled hellcat from Planet Kickass. Trust me, it will outlive you and the offspring that will carry your name. It will live on as a monument to your machismo. Now, go look in the mirror and tell me what you see. If it's a rugged, no holds barred, super brute he-man macho Chuck Norris stunt double, then contact me. I might be out hang-gliding or BASE jumping or just chilling with my ladies, but I'll get back to you. And when I do, we'll talk about a price over a nice glass of Schmidt while we listen to Johnny Cash. To sweeten the deal a little, I'm throwing in this pair of MC Hammer pants for the man with rippling quads that can't fit into regular pants. Yeah, you heard me. FREE MC Hammer pants. Rock on. depoconnor@gmail.com

Bale vs Kermit

This made me chortle...

I saw this on OhNoTheyDidn't

http://community.livejournal.com/ohnotheydidnt/27350111.html

Legend of the Seeker - ep 1.11 this saturday

Here's hoping they explore Kahlan's Con Dar!

Stick to your ribs Chili

Leah made this for us at the office and it was fantastic! For all that a whole crockpot (and then some) was brought, I'm pretty sure all that was left were the scrapings.

Delores Watson’s Almost Homemade Chili

2 lbs. ground beef
1 large Onion
1 46-48 Oz. bottle or can of V-8 Juice
1 Wick Fowlers 2-Alarm Chili Kit
2-3 cans beans – any type of firm bean such as kidney, chili beans, pinto, or black beans
Fritos, grated cheese, sour cream and/or chopped red onion to top each bowl

Chop the onion and sauté in olive oil until it begins to get soft. Add the meat and brown, then drain and return meat and onions to pan (stockpot).

Add all ingredients from the Wick Fowlers kit except the masa. Omit the Red Pepper if you want a mild chili. Mix the spices with the meat until it is coated, then add the V-8 juice. Bring to a boil, then reduce to a low simmer and cook, uncovered, for about 2 hours – stir every 20 minutes or so to keep from sticking. Liquid should reduce and the chili should begin to thicken.

Add the beans and cook for another 20-30 minutes. You can also make it without beans if preferred. Mix the masa from the chili kit with a little hot water, making a liquid roux. Stir it into the chili and cook for another 10 minutes.

Serve in bowls, topped with your choice of toppings.

President Obama's Inauguration Speech

My fellow citizens:

I stand here today humbled by the task before us, grateful for the trust you have bestowed, mindful of the sacrifices borne by our ancestors. I thank President Bush for his service to our nation, as well as the generosity and cooperation he has shown throughout this transition.

Forty-four Americans have now taken the presidential oath. The words have been spoken during rising tides of prosperity and the still waters of peace. Yet, every so often the oath is taken amidst gathering clouds and raging storms. At these moments, America has carried on not simply because of the skill or vision of those in high office, but because We the People have remained faithful to the ideals of our forbearers, and true to our founding documents.

So it has been. So it must be with this generation of Americans.

That we are in the midst of crisis is now well understood. Our nation is at war, against a far-reaching network of violence and hatred. Our economy is badly weakened, a consequence of greed and irresponsibility on the part of some, but also our collective failure to make hard choices and prepare the nation for a new age. Homes have been lost; jobs shed; businesses shuttered. Our health care is too costly; our schools fail too many; and each day brings further evidence that the ways we use energy strengthen our adversaries and threaten our planet.

These are the indicators of crisis, subject to data and statistics. Less measurable but no less profound is a sapping of confidence across our land — a nagging fear that America's decline is inevitable, and that the next generation must lower its sights.

Today I say to you that the challenges we face are real. They are serious and they are many. They will not be met easily or in a short span of time. But know this, America — they will be met.

On this day, we gather because we have chosen hope over fear, unity of purpose over conflict and discord.

On this day, we come to proclaim an end to the petty grievances and false promises, the recriminations and worn out dogmas, that for far too long have strangled our politics.

We remain a young nation, but in the words of Scripture, the time has come to set aside childish things. The time has come to reaffirm our enduring spirit; to choose our better history; to carry forward that precious gift, that noble idea, passed on from generation to generation: the God-given promise that all are equal, all are free, and all deserve a chance to pursue their full measure of happiness.

In reaffirming the greatness of our nation, we understand that greatness is never a given. It must be earned. Our journey has never been one of short-cuts or settling for less. It has not been the path for the faint-hearted — for those who prefer leisure over work, or seek only the pleasures of riches and fame. Rather, it has been the risk-takers, the doers, the makers of things — some celebrated but more often men and women obscure in their labor, who have carried us up the long, rugged path toward prosperity and freedom.

For us, they packed up their few worldly possessions and traveled across oceans in search of a new life.

For us, they toiled in sweatshops and settled the West; endured the lash of the whip and plowed the hard earth.

For us, they fought and died, in places like Concord and Gettysburg; Normandy and Khe Sanh.

Time and again these men and women struggled and sacrificed and worked till their hands were raw so that we might live a better life. They saw America as bigger than the sum of our individual ambitions; greater than all the differences of birth or wealth or faction.

This is the journey we continue today. We remain the most prosperous, powerful nation on Earth. Our workers are no less productive than when this crisis began. Our minds are no less inventive, our goods and services no less needed than they were last week or last month or last year. Our capacity remains undiminished. But our time of standing pat, of protecting narrow interests and putting off unpleasant decisions — that time has surely passed. Starting today, we must pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and begin again the work of remaking America.

For everywhere we look, there is work to be done. The state of the economy calls for action, bold and swift, and we will act — not only to create new jobs, but to lay a new foundation for growth. We will build the roads and bridges, the electric grids and digital lines that feed our commerce and bind us together. We will restore science to its rightful place, and wield technology's wonders to raise health care's quality and lower its cost. We will harness the sun and the winds and the soil to fuel our cars and run our factories. And we will transform our schools and colleges and universities to meet the demands of a new age. All this we can do. And all this we will do.

Now, there are some who question the scale of our ambitions — who suggest that our system cannot tolerate too many big plans. Their memories are short. For they have forgotten what this country has already done; what free men and women can achieve when imagination is joined to common purpose, and necessity to courage.

What the cynics fail to understand is that the ground has shifted beneath them — that the stale political arguments that have consumed us for so long no longer apply. The question we ask today is not whether our government is too big or too small, but whether it works — whether it helps families find jobs at a decent wage, care they can afford, a retirement that is dignified. Where the answer is yes, we intend to move forward. Where the answer is no, programs will end. And those of us who manage the public's dollars will be held to account — to spend wisely, reform bad habits, and do our business in the light of day — because only then can we restore the vital trust between a people and their government.

Nor is the question before us whether the market is a force for good or ill. Its power to generate wealth and expand freedom is unmatched, but this crisis has reminded us that without a watchful eye, the market can spin out of control - and that a nation cannot prosper long when it favors only the prosperous. The success of our economy has always depended not just on the size of our gross domestic product, but on the reach of our prosperity; on our ability to extend opportunity to every willing heart — not out of charity, but because it is the surest route to our common good.

As for our common defense, we reject as false the choice between our safety and our ideals. Our Founding Fathers, faced with perils we can scarcely imagine, drafted a charter to assure the rule of law and the rights of man, a charter expanded by the blood of generations. Those ideals still light the world, and we will not give them up for expedience's sake. And so to all other peoples and governments who are watching today, from the grandest capitals to the small village where my father was born: Know that America is a friend of each nation and every man, woman and child who seeks a future of peace and dignity, and that we are ready to lead once more.

Recall that earlier generations faced down fascism and communism not just with missiles and tanks, but with sturdy alliances and enduring convictions. They understood that our power alone cannot protect us, nor does it entitle us to do as we please. Instead, they knew that our power grows through its prudent use; our security emanates from the justness of our cause, the force of our example, the tempering qualities of humility and restraint.

We are the keepers of this legacy. Guided by these principles once more, we can meet those new threats that demand even greater effort — even greater cooperation and understanding between nations. We will begin to responsibly leave Iraq to its people and forge a hard-earned peace in Afghanistan. With old friends and former foes, we will work tirelessly to lessen the nuclear threat and roll back the specter of a warming planet. We will not apologize for our way of life, nor will we waver in its defense, and for those who seek to advance their aims by inducing terror and slaughtering innocents, we say to you now that our spirit is stronger and cannot be broken; you cannot outlast us, and we will defeat you.

For we know that our patchwork heritage is a strength, not a weakness. We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus — and non-believers. We are shaped by every language and culture, drawn from every end of this Earth; and because we have tasted the bitter swill of civil war and segregation and emerged from that dark chapter stronger and more united, we cannot help but believe that the old hatreds shall someday pass; that the lines of tribe shall soon dissolve; that as the world grows smaller, our common humanity shall reveal itself; and that America must play its role in ushering in a new era of peace.

To the Muslim world, we seek a new way forward, based on mutual interest and mutual respect. To those leaders around the globe who seek to sow conflict or blame their society's ills on the West — know that your people will judge you on what you can build, not what you destroy. To those who cling to power through corruption and deceit and the silencing of dissent, know that you are on the wrong side of history; but that we will extend a hand if you are willing to unclench your fist.

To the people of poor nations, we pledge to work alongside you to make your farms flourish and let clean waters flow; to nourish starved bodies and feed hungry minds. And to those nations like ours that enjoy relative plenty, we say we can no longer afford indifference to suffering outside our borders; nor can we consume the world's resources without regard to effect. For the world has changed, and we must change with it.

As we consider the road that unfolds before us, we remember with humble gratitude those brave Americans who, at this very hour, patrol far-off deserts and distant mountains. They have something to tell us today, just as the fallen heroes who lie in Arlington whisper through the ages. We honor them not only because they are guardians of our liberty, but because they embody the spirit of service; a willingness to find meaning in something greater than themselves. And yet, at this moment — a moment that will define a generation — it is precisely this spirit that must inhabit us all.

For as much as government can do and must do, it is ultimately the faith and determination of the American people upon which this nation relies. It is the kindness to take in a stranger when the levees break, the selflessness of workers who would rather cut their hours than see a friend lose their job which sees us through our darkest hours. It is the firefighter's courage to storm a stairway filled with smoke, but also a parent's willingness to nurture a child, that finally decides our fate.

Our challenges may be new. The instruments with which we meet them may be new. But those values upon which our success depends — hard work and honesty, courage and fair play, tolerance and curiosity, loyalty and patriotism — these things are old. These things are true. They have been the quiet force of progress throughout our history. What is demanded then is a return to these truths. What is required of us now is a new era of responsibility — a recognition, on the part of every American, that we have duties to ourselves, our nation and the world, duties that we do not grudgingly accept but rather seize gladly, firm in the knowledge that there is nothing so satisfying to the spirit, so defining of our character, than giving our all to a difficult task.

This is the price and the promise of citizenship.

This is the source of our confidence — the knowledge that God calls on us to shape an uncertain destiny.

This is the meaning of our liberty and our creed — why men and women and children of every race and every faith can join in celebration across this magnificent mall, and why a man whose father less than 60 years ago might not have been served at a local restaurant can now stand before you to take a most sacred oath.

So let us mark this day with remembrance, of who we are and how far we have traveled. In the year of America's birth, in the coldest of months, a small band of patriots huddled by dying campfires on the shores of an icy river. The capital was abandoned. The enemy was advancing. The snow was stained with blood. At a moment when the outcome of our revolution was most in doubt, the father of our nation ordered these words be read to the people:

"Let it be told to the future world ... that in the depth of winter, when nothing but hope and virtue could survive ... that the city and the country, alarmed at one common danger, came forth to meet [it]."

America. In the face of our common dangers, in this winter of our hardship, let us remember these timeless words. With hope and virtue, let us brave once more the icy currents and endure what storms may come. Let it be said by our children's children that when we were tested we refused to let this journey end, that we did not turn back nor did we falter; and with eyes fixed on the horizon and God's grace upon us, we carried forth that great gift of freedom and delivered it safely to future generations.

Funniest Condom Commercial

AHAHAHAHA

Slow Cooker Vegetarian Stew

This stick-to-your-ribs vegetarian dish can be served over barley, couscous, or millet. Cook whichever grain you choose separately, according to the label directions, and spoon the colorful stew over it just before serving.
4 large carrots, diagonally sliced into 2-inch pieces (about 5 cups)
2 medium turnips, peeled and cut into 1-inch cubes (about 3 cups)
1 large onion, diced (about 1 cup)
2 garlic cloves, minced
1 14-ounce can diced tomatoes
1 cup vegetable broth
1 teaspoon kosher salt
1/2 teaspoon ground cumin
1/4 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes
1 zucchini, cut into 1/2-inch slices
1 16-ounce can chickpeas, drained
Combine the carrots, turnips, onion, garlic, tomatoes (with their liquid), broth, salt, cumin, and pepper flakes in a 4- to 6-quart slow cooker. Cook on low heat for 6 hours, or on high for 3 hours. Add the zucchini and chickpeas and cook 1 hour longer on low.

Yield: Makes 6 servings
NUTRITION PER SERVINGCALORIES 136(0% from fat); FAT 1g (sat 0g); CHOLESTEROL 0mg; CALCIUM 96mg; CARBOHYDRATE 28g; SODIUM 1332mg; PROTEIN 5mg; FIBER 6g; IRON 1mg

Slow cooker Chicken w/ Mushrooms and Onions

Slow-Cooker Recipe: Chicken with Bacon, Mushrooms, and Onions

Serve it with mashed potatoes.
1/2 pound sliced bacon, diced
1 4- to 6-pound chicken, cut up
1/2 cup dry white wine (or 1/4 cup dry vermouth plus 1/4 cup water)
1/2 pound small white mushrooms
1 cup frozen small white onions, thawed
6 garlic cloves, chopped
3 sprigs fresh rosemary (or 1 tablespoon dried rosemary leaves)
1 teaspoon kosher salt
1/4 cup water
2 tablespoons cornstarch
Cook the bacon in a large skillet over medium-low heat until crisp. With a slotted spoon, transfer it to a 4- to 6-quart slow cooker. Pour off all but a light coating of fat from the skillet. Add the chicken and brown over medium-high heat; transfer to the cooker. Pour the wine into the skillet and scrape up any browned bits; add the skillet contents to the cooker, along with the mushrooms, onions, garlic, rosemary, and salt. Cover and cook on low heat for 6 hours, or on high for 3 hours. Transfer the chicken, bacon, and vegetables to a platter; keep warm. Pour the sauce into a small saucepan. Combine the water and cornstarch; stir it into the sauce. Heat to boiling, stirring constantly, until the sauce thickens, about 5 minutes. Pour over the chicken.

Yield: Makes 6 servings

NUTRITION PER SERVINGCALORIES 551(50% from fat); FAT 30g (sat 9g); CHOLESTEROL 212mg; CALCIUM 61mg; CARBOHYDRATE 8g; SODIUM 824mg; PROTEIN 56mg; FIBER 1g; IRON 4mg